meditation Archives - The One You Feed

Adyashanti-Living in the Service of Truth – Part 2

June 25, 2019 By Nicole Silberman 1 Comment

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Adyashanti is an American born spiritual teacher devoted to serving the awakening of all beings. His teachings are an open invitation to stop, inquire and recognize what is true and liberating at the core of all existence. Adyashanti also runs the Omega retreat which Eric has taken part in many times. In this episode, part 2 of a 2 part interview, Eric and Adya continue their conversation about his latest book, The Most Important Thing: Discovering Truth at the Heart of Life.

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In This Interview, Adyashanti and I Discuss…

How his relationship to his wife has become more of a mystery over their 23 years together
The role of play and being silly
How our spiritual striving can get in the way – in meditation, specifically
Meditation is the relinquishing of an agenda
How we engage with the mystery of being.
The curiosity that was sparked when he realized he was a mystery unto himself
Spirituality is an experiential encounter with the unknown
The paradox we’re embracing with meditation
Start meditation by listening to the quiet spaces inside and also let go of trying to control what’s happening in your mind
When you realize you’re lost in thought during meditation, gently encourage your attention back to your meditation anchor or listening
Observe your relationship with failure – or things going some other way than the way you want them to – during meditation
Gratitude for popping out of the dream or trance state
Encountering life attitudes during meditation
Spiritual insight during real life – what do you value at any given moment?
Chasing a spiritual high
Asking “what am I in service to?”
Not having to have the feeling in order to engage in right action

Adyshanti Links:

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If you liked this episode, you might also enjoy these other Adyashanti episodes:

Adyashanti (Part 1) 2018

Adyashanti (Part 2) 2018

Adyashanti (2017)

Oren Jay Sofer on Mindful Communication

April 2, 2019 By Nicole Silberman Leave a Comment

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Oren Jay Sofer leads retreats and workshops on mindful communication and meditation at retreat centers and educational facilities around the United States. He is the founder of Next Step Dharma and Mindful Healthcare and he holds a degree in Comparative Religion from Columbia University. In this episode, he and Eric discuss his new book, Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication. In it, you’ll learn an updated model on how to skillfully communicate – especially in difficult situations. Practical strategies and helpful perspectives are what you’ll get in this episode.

Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.

In This Interview, Oren Jay Sofer and I Discuss…

His book, Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication
That we’re not stuck, our minds can learn and it depends on the choices we make moment to moment
The three steps to create effective conversation
Lead with Presence
Come from Curiosity and Care
Focus on What Matters
How most people live with fragmented attention and it takes training to be fully present with another person
That you can feel whether a person is fully present with you or not
Bringing awareness and attention to the body to come into the present moment (the body is always in the present moment)
Bodily sensations happen in the present moment
The power of pausing
How our rate of speech is connected to our nervous system
That when we are present, we have a lot more choices
That our intention shapes our verbal and non-verbal communications
The intention to understand
The intention of kindness and care
How you can practice kindness to someone you don’t like
Kindness can be about protecting your own heart
The phrase “Let me see if I’ve got it…”
Listening for what matters to the other person – what do they need?
The difference between needs and strategies
The Nonviolent Communication Model
Observations, Feelings, Needs, Requests
Communicating in the workplace

Oren Jay Sofer Links

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If you liked this episode, you might also enjoy these other episodes:

Dan Harris & Oren Jay Sofer (2016)

Jeff Warren

Tara Brach

Ralph De La Rosa on the Mind as Your Teacher

November 13, 2018 By Eric Zimmer 2 Comments

Ralph De La Rosa -Full- The One You Feed

Ralph De La Rosa is a psychotherapist in private practice in NYC. He specializes in helping people resolve their childhood traumas, anxiety, depression and intimacy issues. You might have seen his work in places like CNN, GQ, Self, or Women’s Health. His new book is called The Monkey is the Messenger and it is an instructional and revolutionary look at what it means to attend and befriend ones self. In this interview, he shares some of the key practices that are most helpful along this journey.

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In This Interview, Ralph De La Rosa and I Discuss…

His book, The Monkey is the Messenger
The truest sentence he knows – there’s always more to the story
The monkey – what it is and why it’s on our side
The monkey mind as our teacher
The monkey mind drives us towards meditation and away from meditation
Our triggers are on the surface and they are connected to something deeper within us that’s unhealed. We can absolutely get to that root through mindfulness and meditation.
The value of showing up for a daily practice
Drawing the attention out of our head and into our body gets our brain activated in the right hemisphere
The right hemisphere – nonlinguistic, free of chatter
Emotions are held in the body
The unconscious mind is accessed in the body because emotions show up in our body
Radical Nonpathology
Love, gratification and safety are at the root
How can I be happy? How can I avoid suffering?
What looks pathological are our misguided attempts to meet these root needs and drivers
Holding our emotions like children
Using circumstances to heal rather than being retraumatized through emotional warmth
That difficult emotions are messengers to us
Abandoning or ignoring any part of ourselves is equivalent to enacting aggression towards ourselves.
How Vinny Ferraro says you can’t hate your way into enlightenment
The inner critic
Emotions always follow a logic

Ralph De La Rosa Links

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Ruth King on Healing Racism

November 6, 2018 By Eric Zimmer Leave a Comment

Ruth King is an emotional wisdom author, coach, and consultant. She’s a guiding teacher at Insight Meditation Community of Washington and she’s on the teacher’s council at Spirit Rock Meditation Center. In addition, she’s the founder of Mindful Members Insight Meditation Community in Charlotte, NC. She has a Master’s Degree in Clinical Psychology and is the author of several publications including her new book, Mindful of Race: Transforming Racism from the Inside Out. In this stirring, thoughtful and wise conversation, she touches on the heart of racism and teaches how we can move to heal this heart disease.

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In This Interview, Ruth King and I Discuss…

Her book, Mindful of Race: Transforming Racism From The Inside Out
The value of being curious about the good and bad wolves inside of us
Racism being a heart disease that is curable
Her open heart surgery at the age of 27
Rage being an exit route
Rage being energy moving through the body
Habitual patterns of racism being a layer on top of the real issue that we can’t tolerate – they are defense mechanisms
Racial affinity groups
6 hindrances
The structure of racism
Racism vs Prejudice
Racist vs Racism
Understanding our own experience with racism and talking about it
What it’s like to be “membered”
Individual vs group identity
Diversity within the body of color

Ruth King Links

Homepage

Facebook

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Re-Release: Tara Brach

October 9, 2018 By Eric Zimmer Leave a Comment

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This week we talk to Tara Brach

Tara Brach is an American psychologist and proponent of Buddhist meditation. She is a guiding teacher and founder of the Insight Meditation Community of Washington, D.C Brach also teaches Buddhist meditation at centers for meditation and yoga in the United States and Europe including Spirit Rock Meditation Center in Woodacre, California, the Kripalu Center,and the Omega Institute for Holistic Studies.

Brach is an engaged Buddhist specializing in the application of Buddhist teachings to emotional healing. Her 2003 book, Radical Acceptance: Embracing Your Life With the Heart of a Buddha, focuses on the use of practices such as mindfulness for healing trauma. Her 2013 book, True Refuge: Finding Peace and Freedom in Your Own Awakened Heart, offers practices for tapping into inner peace and wisdom in the midst of difficulty.

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In This Interview, Tara Brach and I Discuss…

The One You Feed parable
Being kind to the parts of ourselves that are more primitive
The difference between feelings and thoughts
Dropping the storyline
The question of “What am I unwilling to feel?”
How we have to go through the difficult emotions to get to peace
The importance of remembering the good
Not being addicted to suffering
The habit of looking for what’s wrong
What’s the moment like if there is no problem
How we tend to always anticipate a problem
How we are almost always lost in thought
Practicing coming into our senses
Self-compassion as the most important quality on the spiritual path
Only being taught one type of meditation
Trying different types of meditation until we find the one that works best for us
The quality that helps people progress on the path of meditation: intention
How to deal with numbness
Tara’s tips on dealing with depression
How depression hates a moving target
That depression is not our fault
Finding refuge in difficult times
Instead of asking “What’s the Meaning” asking “What matters to me here”

Tara Brach Links

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Twitter

Facebook

Dorothy Hunt on The Heart of Awareness

October 2, 2018 By Eric Zimmer Leave a Comment

Dorothy Hunt serves as the spiritual director of the Moon Mountain Sangha, teaching the spiritual lineage of Adyshanti. She is also the founder of the San Francisco Center for Meditation and Psychotherapy where she has practiced since 1967. She has several published works, the most recent being her book, Ending the Search: From Spiritual Ambition to the Heart of Awareness. We think you’ll find her teachings profound, liberating and refreshing. In this episode, she and Eric discuss what it means and looks like to awaken to our true reality. She dropped some truth bombs on us and if you listen to the conversation, we think they’ll land on you as well.

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In This Interview, Dorothy Hunt and I Discuss…

Her book, Ending the Search: From Spiritual Ambition to the Heart of Awareness
How we carry the seeds of everything within us – which do we water with our attention?
That everything is an “inside job”
Her focus of awakening to our true reality
What spiritual ambition means
The role of self-inquiry in awakening to who/what we really are
A unified reality
Desire, effort, and grace
Intensity taking the place for ambition
Staying put in the not knowing
Staying put in the silence
Expansion and contraction in life
The error of thinking that our spirituality has to look a certain way
Alternatives to silence as your soul food
Asking ourselves the question: What is the deepest desire of my heart?
Asking the follow-up question: And what will that bring? to get to the deepest desire
Following your own inner teacher, your inner guidance
That happiness is temporarily stopping wanting to be somewhere else
That Adyashanti gave her nothing
The sword that cuts through illusion
When truth is moving it’s not asking permission
When we want the truth more than we want life to look a certain way we find it

Dorothy Hunt Links

Homepage

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Miguel Chen on Punk Rock and Buddhism

September 25, 2018 By Eric Zimmer 2 Comments

Miguel Chen is a meditation practitioner, a yoga instructor, a yoga studio owner and the bass player for a punk rock band. He has also published a book called I Wanna Be Well: How a Punk Found Peace and You Can Too. In this compelling episode, Eric and Miguel explore the connection between punk rock and Buddhism and they dive into the experiences in his life – both traumatic and positive – that have shaped his spiritual path of awakening.

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In This Interview, Miguel Chen and I Discuss…

His book, I Wanna Be Well: How a Punk Found Peace and You Can Too
How he owns a yoga studio and plays in a punk rock band
The way he suppressed grief for dead family members
Asking himself why he wasn’t happy
The connection between punk rock and Buddhism
The other as self
Forgetting who we are
The importance of being mindful throughout life
Not being present with stuff we like
Not being present with stuff we don’t like
Eating mindfully
How if you’re used to disconnecting from things you don’t like, it starts creeping into the things you do like
How he stays in the present moment
Training the mind
His morning routine
Non-attachment
Being criticized for his spiritual practice
His spiritual practice while on tour
The danger of taking people in life for granted
How grateful he is that he woke up early in his life
Why some people get motivated to get sober and others don’t

Miguel Chen Links

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Instagram

Twitter

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Chris Bailey on Focus, Productivity and Meditation

August 28, 2018 By Eric Zimmer 3 Comments

Chris Bailey ran a year-long productivity project where he studied and ran experiments on the subject. To date, he’s written hundreds of articles on the topic which have been published in places like the Huffington Post, The New York Times and LifeHacker. In this episode, Chris and Eric discuss his new book, Hyperfocus: How to Be More Productive in a World of Distraction and they cover many topics and techniques to improve your focus and productivity. In addition to being a lovely person, he is also a true expert on this topic and you’ll walk away with useful information, no matter how productive you are to begin with.

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In This Interview, Chris Bailey and I Discuss…

His new book, Hyperfocus: How to Be More Productive in a World of Distraction
That what we notice is what we become
The state of our attention determines the state of our lives
The hourly awareness chime
How our mind gravitates to things that are any of these three things: pleasurable, threatening or novel
The measures he uses to determine the quality of attention: how long we can hold our focus, how long our mind wanders, how much of our time we can spend with intention
How we feel when we use our time well
The pain of using time wastefully
The Rule of 3 (Daily, Weekly, Monthly, Yearly)
Text Expander
The natural rhythm of our attention
Being kind to our mind
Our minds are built to wander
Approaching our wandering minds with curiosity
Keeping a distractions list
Scatter focus

Chris Bailey Links

Homepage

Twitter

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Culadasa Part 1-How Our Minds Work

July 11, 2018 By Eric Zimmer Leave a Comment

Culadasa is a meditation master with over 4 decades of experience in the Tibetan and Theravadan Buddhist traditions. He taught classes in neuroscience and psychology at the Universities of Calgary and Brittish Columbia. He now lives in the Arizona wilderness and leads the Dharma Treasure Buddhist Sanga. His book on meditation, The Mind Illuminated, is the book Eric calls the best book on meditation he’s ever read. This is a two-part interview. In this episode, part one, Eric and Culadasa talk about how the mind and brain works – knowledge that is essential to understand before one can successfully implement the meditation techniques that will be discussed in part two. These techniques have the very real potential of transforming your meditation experience. So listen up in this episode and get ready to radically re-understand this thing we call the mind.

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In This Interview, Culadasa and I Discuss…

His book, The Mind Illuminated
How the mind and the brain works
The basic distinction between attention and awareness
How when we give labels to something we can know and understand it better
The moments of consciousness model
Non-perceiving moments of consciousness
The dullness of meditation
Sleepiness in meditation
The goal of vipassana is to increase the total power of our cognitive abilities
The mind system model (how the mind works)
The conscious and unconscious mind
Sensory sub-mind (taking in info through senses)
Discriminating sub-mind (cognitive thinking/feeling)
These sub-minds are competing for attention
The conscious mind is a place that the sub-minds project into
The power of setting intentions on the sub-minds
The role of the narrating sub-mind
We are a collection of the processes of the sub-minds
Making intellectual sense of the experience of not-self

Culadasa Links

Homepage

Facebook

Twitter

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A grandfather is talking with his grandson and he says there are two wolves inside of us which are always at war with each other.

One of them is a good wolf which represents things like kindness, bravery and love. The other is a bad wolf, which represents things like greed, hatred and fear.

The grandson stops and thinks about it for a second then he looks up at his grandfather and says, “Grandfather, which one wins?”

The grandfather quietly replies, the one you feed

The Tale of Two Wolves is often attributed to the Cherokee indians but there seems to be no real proof of this. It has also been attributed to evangelical preacher Billy Graham and Irish Playwright George Bernard Shaw. It appears no one knows for sure but this does not diminish the power of the parable.

This parable goes by many names including:

The Tale of Two Wolves

The Parable of the Two Wolves

Two Wolves

Which Wolf Do You Feed

Which Wolf are You Feeding

Which Wolf Will You Feed

It also often features different animals, mainly two dogs

Mark Epstein on the Intersection of Buddhism and Psychology

May 1, 2018 By Eric Zimmer Leave a Comment

Mark Epstein is a psychiatrist in private practice in NYC and the author of many books about the intersection of Buddhism and psychotherapy. He’s currently the clinical assistant professor in the postdoctoral program in Psychotherapy and Psychoanalysis at New York University. His most recent book, Advice Not Given; A Guide to Getting Over Yourself is what he talks about in this episode. His wisdom is so incredibly practical, applicable, and helpful. Ideas like whether or not naming your feelings would be a helpful strategy for you and how to work with clinging in its many forms – even the clinging to inner peace – abound in this discussion. Take a listen and enrich your inner life.

Visit oneyoufeed.net/transform to learn more about our personal transformation program.

In This Interview, Mark Epstein and I Discuss…

The Wolf Parable
His book, Advice Not Given; A Guide to Getting Over Yourself
The duality that we all struggle with
Freud and the Buddha’s nearly identical conclusion
What it means to take personal responsibility for our selfish concerns
The clinging to that which gives us a sense of control over life
The clinging to that which nurtures our ego
The eightfold path of the Buddha
The conversation with his terminally ill father that inspired this book
Right View – being realistic about one’s self and the nature of things
How change and death is happening all of the time, moment to moment
Trying not to try as it relates to meditation
“Take the backward step” in meditation
FInding balance in “right effort”
Exploring the feelings that we are otherwise afraid of through psychotherapy
The link between being with uncomfortable feelings and empathy to others
How anything that’s happening in the body or mind can be the object of meditation
How useful it is to name a feeling
Making a feeling “intelligible” by naming it
How useful it can be to find where feelings show up in the body
When your mind is not aware of what’s making you act this way (in addiction, compulsive behaviors etc) it’s important to put the words on the feelings
Whether or not all emotions show up in the body
How clinging takes many forms – even the desire for inner peace
“Don’t chase her, let her find you.”
That our lives are made dull by our efforts to over control things

Mark Epstein Links

Please Support The Show with a Donation

A grandfather is talking with his grandson and he says there are two wolves inside of us which are always at war with each other.

One of them is a good wolf which represents things like kindness, bravery and love. The other is a bad wolf, which represents things like greed, hatred and fear.

The grandson stops and thinks about it for a second then he looks up at his grandfather and says, “Grandfather, which one wins?”

The grandfather quietly replies, the one you feed

This parable goes by many names including:

The Tale of Two Wolves

The Parable of the Two Wolves

Two Wolves

Which Wolf Do You Feed

Which Wolf are You Feeding

Which Wolf Will You Feed

It also often features different animals, mainly two dogs

In This Interview, Adyashanti and I Discuss…

Adyshanti Links:

In This Interview, Oren Jay Sofer and I Discuss…

Oren Jay Sofer Links

In This Interview, Ralph De La Rosa and I Discuss…

Ralph De La Rosa Links

In This Interview, Ruth King and I Discuss…

Ruth King Links

We want to know what you want

This week we talk to Tara Brach

In This Interview, Tara Brach and I Discuss…

Tara Brach Links

In This Interview, Dorothy Hunt and I Discuss…

Dorothy Hunt Links

In This Interview, Miguel Chen and I Discuss…

Miguel Chen Links

In This Interview, Chris Bailey and I Discuss…

Chris Bailey Links

Visit oneyoufeed.net/transform to learn more about our personal transformation program.

In This Interview, Culadasa and I Discuss…

Culadasa Links

Visit oneyoufeed.net/transform to learn more about our personal transformation program.

In This Interview, Mark Epstein and I Discuss…

Mark Epstein Links

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