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Susan David is a psychologist on faculty at Harvard Medical School. She’s also the co-founder and co-director of The Institute of Coaching at McLean Hospital and is CEO of Evidence-Based Psychology. Have you ever gotten hooked by a difficult emotion? In other words, have you ever felt compelled to act on a strong feeling without having any space to think about your action first? If so, you will find really helpful wisdom in this episode that you can take, apply today and live a more skillful, open-hearted life.

In this episode, Eric and Susan David discuss her book, Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life

Registration for The Well Trained Mind Program is now open!  Learn the foundations of mindfulness and create a more fulfilling spiritual practice in Ginny’s live virtual program that starts on October 9.  Visit oneyoufeed.net/mindfulness to learn more!

Susan David and I Discuss How to Create Emotional Agility and …

• Her book, Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life
• How emotions are a guidance system and aren’t good or bad
• Learning 
• That emotions can help us adapt and thrive
• The thinking “unless I’m happy all the time, something is wrong”
• Emotional agility is when we connect with our values and move forward in action
• Emotional rigidity is when we believe the negative voice in our head and are reactive or on autopilot
• How we get “hooked” when we accept our thoughts as facts
• Strategies for getting “unhooked” 
• Recognizing our patterns and being curious and compassionate about how we’re reacting
• Understanding that tough emotions are part of life
• Shifting thing from “I am ____ ” to “I notice that I’m feeling_____”
• Choice points:  do I move towards or away from my values?
• Our values are quality of action
• Social contagion describes how we catch other peoples’ behaviors and emotions
• The power of keeping our values front of mind
• A meaningful life comes with discomfort
• How our difficult emotions are signposts for our values
• Premature cognitive commitment is when we decide before we think

Susan David Links

Susan’s Website

Twitter

Instagram

Facebook

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If you enjoyed this conversation with Susan David, check out these other episodes:

How to Handle Emotions with Hilary Jacobs Hendel

How to Cope with Big Feelings with Liz Fosslien

Dr. Christian Conte is one of the country’s most accomplished mental health specialists in the field of anger and emotional management. He specializes in working in the prison system with people convicted of violent crimes. In this episode, he and Eric discuss his book, Walking Through Anger: A New Design for Confronting Conflict in an Emotionally Charged World. If this conversation about radical anger management rubs you the wrong way in the beginning, we invite you to get curious about your reaction and stay with the conversation – you may feel and think differently by the end of the episode.

You can find all of the most up to date crisis help & support resources that Eric is making available through The One You Feed by going to www.oneyoufeed.net/help

The wisdom and practice of self-compassion is a foundational principle that Eric teaches and helps his private clients learn to apply through the 1-on-1 Spiritual Habits Program. To learn more about this program, click here.

Need help with completing your goals in 2020? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.

But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!

In This Interview, Christian Conte and I discuss Radical Anger Management and…

• His book, Walking Through Anger: A New Design for Confronting Conflict in an Emotionally Charged World
• Working with our own anger 
• The relationship between our ego and our anger
• Anger management
• That our expectations influence our experience of the world
• Hindsight bias
• How anger is a wonderful motivator
• That if we loosen our grip on being right, we can humble ourselves to receive other perspectives
• The metaphor of only being able to see one side of the box
• Switching to a position of curiosity 
• That certainty is an emotion, not a cognition
• Leading humility and curiosity lessens the intensity of a situation
• By saying, “here’s what I’m seeing, please teach me about what you’re seeing”, you can change the energy of the conversation
• How we can drain our own limbic system in the midst of feeling angry
• What it means that our mind wants to match our body
• Why he recommends that we go to bed angry (instead of following the old adage that says otherwise)
• That when we understand something intellectually, we think we’ve mastered putting it into practice in our lives
• That extreme language produces extreme emotions
• How we’re not disturbed by things – we’re disturbed by our view of things
• That certainty is at the heart of a lot of anger

Dr. Christian Conte Links:

drchristianconte.com

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If you enjoyed this conversation with Dr. Christian Conte on Radical Anger Management, you might also enjoy these other episodes:

Special Episode: How to Work with Anger

Liz Fosslien

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

You can find all of the most up to date crisis help & support resources that Eric is making available through The One You Feed by going to www.oneyoufeed.net/help

So many of us are feeling angry for a myriad of reasons amidst the COVID-19 pandemic. To help us better understand and work with our anger, Eric reached out to several previous guests of the show to ask them if they would be willing to talk with him for a special edition of The One You Feed Podcast about anger. They all generously agreed at a moment’s notice and this episode featuring 4 “mini-interviews” is the result. These are all new conversations with previous guests, Rick Hanson, Hilary Jacobs Hendel, Ruth King, and David Richo.

In This Episode, We discuss How to Work with Anger and…

• That anger is a natural and normal response
• Utilizing anger rather than letting anger utilize us
• How anger can feel good in the moment but it corrodes over time
• Finding peace when confronted with the truth of uncertainty
• Mindfully noticing and naming our anger
• Anger being triggered by perceived danger and it readies us for a fight
• The danger of blocking our anger
• That we feel anger as energy that wants to get out
• Using fantasy to release the energy of anger 
• When calm, making a list of “state-changers” for yourself
• Noticing our coping strategies in the face of things we can’t control
• The critical choice of what to do with the energy of anger
• Being informed by our anger instead of reacting out of it
• Channeling the energy in constructive ways rather than damaging ways
• Getting curious about what the anger is trying to tell us – rather than focusing on what it’s saying about other people
• Getting fiercely clear about rather than ablaze in the fire of our anger
• When we’re in the anger, we lose touch with how it’s impacting our bodies
• Setting the intention of doing no harm 
• That fear is often underneath anger
• Not acting out of anger because it can be abusive

Links to Other Episodes:

Rick Hanson

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Ruth King

David Richo

Judith Blackstone is an innovative and experienced teacher in the contemporary fields of non-dual realization and spiritual, relational, and somatic psychotherapy. She developed The Realization Process, which is a direct path for realizing fundamental consciousness. She also teaches the application of non-dual realization for psychological, relational, and physical healing. Judith has taught The Realization Process for over 35 years throughout the United States and Europe. She currently has 6 books in publication including her latest book, Trauma and the Unbound Body: The Healing Power of Fundamental Consciousness.

Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.

But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!

In This Interview, Judith Blackstone and I discuss Healing Trauma through Consciousness and …

• Her book, Trauma and the Unbound Body: The Healing Power of Fundamental Consciousness
• Uncovering fundamental consciousness
• Attuning to the 3 components of fundamental consciousness: awareness, emotion, and physical sensation
• Defining trauma
• The way we hold back things that won’t be met with approval
• How traumatic events cause us to be divided – driving us out of our fundamental nature of wholeness, which is fundamental consciousness
• Inhabiting our body vs scanning our body
• Releasing trauma through our bodies
• Healing trauma through consciousness
• Psychological healing in addition to spiritual awakening
• The role of memory in healing trauma
• Accessing memories through somatic connections
• Healing trauma in relation to other people as well as with other people

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Judith Blackstone Links:

realizationprocess.org

Facebook

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If you enjoyed this conversation with Judith Blackstone on Healing Trauma through Consciousness, you might also enjoy these other episodes:

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Mary O’Malley

Susan David is a psychologist on faculty at Harvard Medical School. She’s also the co-founder and co-director of The Institute of Coaching at McLean Hospital and is CEO of Evidence-Based Psychology. Her book is, Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life. Have you ever gotten hooked by a difficult emotion? In other words, have you ever felt compelled to act on a strong feeling without having any space to think about your action first? If so, you will find really helpful wisdom in this episode that you can take, apply today and live a more skillful, open-hearted life.

Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.

But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!

---

In This Interview, Susan David and I Discuss…

• Her book, Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life
• How emotions are a guidance system
  
• That emotions can help us adapt and thrive
  
• The thinking “unless I’m happy all the time, something is wrong”
  
• Emotional Agility
  
• Loosening up, calming down and living with more intention
  
• The space between stimulus and response
  
• Emotional rigidity
  
• Allowing the story in our head to drive our actions
  
• Being who we most want to be in this world
  
• Moving away from the idea of “I have a thought and the thought is fact and I have to act on it”
  
• Getting hooked – accepting thought as fact
  
• That we are not our emotions – our emotions are a data source
  
• The story that imprisons and keeps us from acting in an open-hearted way
  
• How to get unhooked
  
• Getting curious and compassionate about our emotions when we’re hooked
  
• I’m noticing that I’m feeling ____
  
• Creating a safe psychological space for ourselves
  
• “Walking your why”
  
• Choice points: do I move towards my values or away from my values?
  
• Social contagion
  
• Keeping your values front of mind
  
• Discomfort is the price of admission to a meaningful life
  
• That our difficult emotions (like anxiety, for example) don’t have to go away in order for us to live according to our values
  
• Under our difficult emotions are signposts for our values
  
• Premature cognitive commitment
  
• Stories help us to make sense of our world
  
• Naming our stories

Susan David, Ph.D. Links:

susandavid.com

Ted Talk – Susan David, Ph.D.

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Twitter

Instagram

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If you like this episode you might enjoy these other episodes:

Ralph De La Rosa

Hilary Jacobs Hendel