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220: Catherine Gray

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Catherine Gray -Full- The One You Feed

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Catherine Gray is an award-winning writer and editor. Her most recent book is called, The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober. What a brilliant title and what a brilliant book. In it – and in this interview – Catherine offers so many good ideas, phrases, and pearls of wisdom to take away and keep close by. She shares a bit about her journey to and through sobriety with Eric and the critical “ah ha” moments along the way that really helped her build the life she’s living today. If you don’t have a revelatory moment when listening to her in this interview, we’ll be surprised.
 
Our sponsor this week is Casper Mattress visit  www.casper.com/oneyoufeed  and use the promo code theoneyoufeed for $50 off your purchase

In This Interview, Catherine Gray and I Discuss…

  • The Wolf Parable
  • Her book, The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober
  • The challenge of training our brains to look for the good stuff in life
  • The question: Would my life be better sober? instead of Am I an alcoholic?
  • Rock bottom being a different place for different people at different times
  • The challenge of moderation
  • The beautiful clarity of zero
  • The limbic system in distress with indecision
  • Controlling vs Enjoying drinking
  • Alcohol being like a cheat code in a video game when it comes to inhibition
  • That no one regrets being sober
  • The awful feelings at the beginning of getting sober are what you feel like because of the drinking, not the getting sober
  • Learning the skills to enjoy life sober
  • Addictive voice recognition
  • Negative Thought Patterns:
    • B&B
    • Children in a car
    • Bird watching
  • That there are many different ways to get sober
  • How expectations are resentments under construction
  • Day counting in being sober
  • I don’t vs I can’t

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A grandfather is talking with his grandson and he says there are two wolves inside of us which are always at war with each other. 

One of them is a good wolf which represents things like kindness, bravery and love. The other is a bad wolf, which represents things like greed, hatred and fear.

The grandson stops and thinks about it for a second then he looks up at his grandfather and says, “Grandfather, which one wins?”

The grandfather quietly replies, the one you feed 

The Tale of Two Wolves is often attributed to the Cherokee Indians but there seems to be no real proof of this. It has also been attributed to evangelical preacher Billy Graham and Irish Playwright George Bernard Shaw. It appears no one knows for sure but this does not diminish the power of the parable.

This parable goes by many names including:

The Tale of Two Wolves

The Parable of the Two Wolves

Two Wolves

Which Wolf Do You Feed

Which Wolf are You Feeding

Which Wolf Will You Feed

It also often features different animals, mainly two dogs

How to Embrace Imperfection with Anne Lamott

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In an episode, Anne Lamott explores a variety of themes including how to embrace imperfection, self-improvement, creativity, and the journey towards self-acceptance. Anne shares candid reflections on her personal struggles with perfectionism, shame, and the inner critic, offering valuable insights into the transformative power of self-compassion. She delves into the importance of unlearning harmful teachings from childhood, emphasizing the need to release the pressure of doing things perfectly and to embrace imperfection as a part of the human experience. Anne’s journey of faith and recovery also provides a unique perspective on navigating personal struggles and finding support in community.

In this episode, you will be able to:

  • Embrace imperfection to unlock personal growth and self-acceptance.
  • Overcome perfectionism and self-criticism for a more fulfilling life.
  • Discover the benefits of community in your recovery journey
  • Find spirituality in sobriety to enhance your overall well-being
  • Manage your inner critic as a writer to unleash your creativity

FREE Meditation Guide! Discover the Top 5 Reasons You Can’t Seem To Stick With A Meditation Practice —And How To Actually Build One That Lasts: Click Here to Download NOW

Anne Lamott is the author of the New York Times bestsellers Dusk, Night, Dawn; Almost Everything; Hallelujah Anyway; Small Victories; Stitches; Help, Thanks, Wow; Some Assembly Required; Grace (Eventually); Plan B; and Traveling Mercies, as well as several novels. Her latest book is Somehow: Thoughts on Love: Anne is a past recipient of a Guggenheim Fellowship and an inductee to the California Hall of Fame.

Connect with Anne Lamott: Website | Instagram | Facebook

If you enjoyed this conversation with Anne Lamott, check out these other episodes:

068: Byron Katie- The Work

The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober with Catherine Gray

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